# Set your goal and build a shortlist

Lesson 1 of [Vet a dating coach before you pay](https://datingcoaches.fyi/academy/vet-a-dating-coach-before-you-pay.md), 12 minutes.

A clear goal makes every later step easier.

## Write your goal in one sentence

Here are three examples. 'I want to feel at ease on a first date.' 'I want a profile that shows who I am.' 'I want to be introduced to people who want a partner.'

Your goal tells you which kind of help to look at first. A coach teaches skills. A matchmaker screens candidates and introduces you to partners.

## Build a shortlist of three

Look at two or three businesses. Do not look at only one. For each one, read its own website and write down:

- Who it works with.
- Its format: in person, video, phone, group or self-paced.
- Every price it publishes, and what each price covers.
- Whether the intro call is free.
- Where it says it trained.

## Use one comparison sheet

Put the facts for all three businesses in one sheet. Use these rows: works with people like me, format I can use, total cost for all sessions, what is included, and how it handles a stop. Leave a cell empty if you do not know the answer. Then ask the business to fill it.

## Prices change

Write the date you read each price. Prices change. Check the provider page again before you pay.

## Sources

- Dating Coaches Directory guide, How to choose a dating coach or matchmaker (updated 2026-10-20)
- Dating Coaches Directory, How to Vet a Dating Coach (updated 2026-10-21)

Also on the [web page](https://datingcoaches.fyi/academy/vet-a-dating-coach-before-you-pay/goal-and-shortlist).